already
wow i can remeber the last post i did xD
shoons not far off agen <3
hikaru will be 19 am i right? or 20? nope 19 he will be
ok happy birthday to him then =D for that day


i like this picture of him ^^
ahh shoonie will be 21 ^^
then its yabu i guess
yabu is in bidan >< he is on the front cover i want the scans so bad >

yup yup
i bought a reborn
she should arrive in 2 to 3 days
but knowing post deliverys they take foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
ok i also receved a ueda uchiwa too since i started to like him
NOT as much as shoon never as much as shoon
tomorrow im going to a meeting to arrnage my paper work for jobs and suport because i need it due to the disbilatys i have!
and also i will be looking in town tomorrow for a little cot like thing for the doll to place in my room
otherwise it will be in a box under my bed the hole time lol
anyone looking fowerd to xmas?
im over my nans with my cousions for the day so should be all good
well im tired
is it me or is the days going faster?
its my sisters 6th b-day this weekend
we have arranged her to meet her freinds in a hall and there will be fun and games for her
i will be going back and forth to the house
lmfao
the hamster right now x
on the top of her wheel running xD she looks retared bless her
well im gonna go agen guys
hope yall ok , take care bye bye

u must be thinking wtf right now
well xmas is comeing up right
i had nothing in mind till i saw a pram in town a while back
my brain started to work and i thought of something i really wanted
xmas is a good time to get one since they aint cheap
ok reborns are basicly dolls that are life like
creepy huh?
i thought so still i started to like go all guey about them
i want one xD
im after a little asian girl i found but someone else bought it so i just gotta keep serching for the right one you know :P
people please dont think im strange
i think my mother side is starting to show alot more now xD
when i was younger i hated kids but now i think there really cute!
here is a picture of what they look like to give u an idea
( reborn doll )

i looked all over i cant find shoons scans for the new mags that have come out
agen all the hsj and news has been out
still no shoon
anyone has er whats the word, scaned the shoon parts
i will be so greatfull
if there is anyone selling shoon stuff please let me know ^^ thankies x

uh uh
im sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
*slams head on table*

i know its been ages!! i just not have thought of anything to write
i been down the the past couple of months
i been hybernateing in my room! i looked into a hospital for work then they directred me else where, cant life just be simple!!!
*sigh*
im not alright.............not today
god xmas soon i got nothing yet i dont have anything i want for xmas other than the impossible!!! (shoon + japan = xmas) xD
i have so much on my mind i cant take it anymore
the yabu thing with that girl ><
shoon not appering much
how i feel in myself, i hate it!
i wish i was like rikku agen lol

i used to be like her as a kid, even now when im not depressed
sometimes people think im strange
is that wrong >< just being happy, well they won!!!!
they turned me into a emo lol
you know what
some people have called me retared for what! being different? haveing red hair, walking funny because i have scoliosis >< danm it
its not my falt
ha my freinds step dad called me a spaz
i was so upset hearing that
a grown adult aged 37 with a child calling me a spaz
what ever did i do to him fuck sakes
ya call me what u like man lest i aint a fat ****** like you
sorry for the beeping but seriously
im fed up to death of people takeing the piss
like me or not but insults just get u nowhere ><
i have some gothic clothes im TRYING to sell but i cant at the moment because i dont know how, i have well most of my gothic clothes i bought dont even fit and plus i dont where them anymore so there going
and some liveing dead dolls i have!! my goth days are over
but music wise still into lol
im into the hole retro style clotheing now like 50s 60s clothes sometimes just cocktail dresses and such i like there purrdy xD lol
oh im starting to feel better talking to myself like retard
oh there it goes agen
oh i thought of something i wanna have for xmas
shoonie
omg 0__o its that time already
i been on here for a hole year or more god wow awesome
birthday time for me............god now im sounding gay
i miss happy me , im going to get happy me back :P
xmas is soon i try and liven up ha god my spelling sucks
ya get used to it!
i have nothing to talk je wise atm so something will come to me when i finish this entry i bet although i taken alot more intrest in ueda now gah he is always in my head along with shoon xD no 1 shoon <3
omg forogt
so many people asked me to marry them over the net, total about 6 people ,
WTF big time
they dont know me, never met me xD and they think im gonna turn to them say yes , what the heck seriously!
am i really that retarded >< no if i sayed yes i would of been a dumb ass
ohhhhhhhhhhhh anyway im gonna love ya and leve ya guys and gurrrrrrrrrrrrrlys
have a great weekend yall and take cares byex
LOVE AND PEACE XXXX

i found this bbs site for yabu and i really wanna be a member but i cant read the site ><
if anyone can help me or make me a member i would be so greatfull :)

http://yabukota131.5d6d.com/bbs.php

hahahaha
like i has soooooo much goood time ^^ in london
im so hyped i cant talk
um yer this song is great
ill post london stuff later
im off to the libery wonder why im hyped
this song is not helping and yabu pic galore
god i have no ink so i have to go out to town to get prints xD
oh i applyed for a job at a cattery i hope that it works for me ^^
ya song here its good :P


i sing and dance to it xD
yabu time
laters xxx

ok so i was bored today like mega
i came across this site and it amused me for hours
forget jonnys
these guys are hot
and its so kool if i went to japan i can actuly get one xD well to drink with i guess garanteD
im sorry shoon i love you with all my heart
but im haveing time to myself here man so many guys so little time xD
check this site out

http://www.air-group.jp/history.html

hello
um there is a show im looking for
but i dont know its called but yabu and hikaru are in it with the red and blue team
anyway
there is an ep im looking for where yabu goes on a arcade mashine
can someone tell me where i can find it >

hey all
im in such a hyper mood i just feel like talking
sooo today i was in town with freinds!
it was raining now and then and i was whereing a dress , like i was going out for a posh meal , people kept stareing at me all the time god sake like whats there problem .......
anyway i had a good time! i went to see my freinds and we had a good time lol
one of my freinds today found £20 on the floor, i was like :O i could of seen that i was right next to it aswell.
no one was in the building so she took it , i meen i would of asked but what can you do ...........£20 no ones asking for it!! luckyyyy
so we got something to eat and when in some shops!
i bought a frame and it broke when i got home >:( i was well pissed off!
it was cheap so it dident bother me as much (not with the £20, shes kept it for herself....... how rude)
we also went to the arcades aswell and my freinds brother went on this pac man mashine and put a load of 10ps in there lol no joke he randomly got 50 more 10p put in from the mashine because he got a jack pot! i was like omg thats £5 there 0__0 it was funny! hm what else happend..... well i spoke ALOT and i never talk atall but i was blabbing on and on, i think my freinds wanted me to shut up , but i was in one of those moods!
when i talk with family memebers and freinds they look at me and think 0___0 my god
i wish she was like this independantly, like in job interviews or oppointments in hospitals extra, thats when i go shy!
kinda like shoon in a way like he was in ya ya yah , always head down and hands behind his back , now he is in that quiz show its like a different persion , thats how im like in real life too !
loads of people say im lovely, and it makes me feel bad because i feel like there just saying it to bew nice :S am i?
because i dont feel it i meen i look sooooooooooooo ugly why whould someone like me......
i better not depress myself *changes subject* %$*%$" bullys >:(.
so anyway i got a bit of money for my b-day and im saveing it for london
thank god i only have to get duet mag xD since shoon is in no other , so it saves me money but i will get the other mags tooo hopefully but yar...................... if i have the money for it
um , i hate it when my brain goes dead on me!!!
yes i wanna get wink up and potato aswell for hsj
i dont get popolo or myojo anymore, to me i find them boring so i wait for there scans
duet wink up ect have more celebs in there and mostly shoon so they appel to me more!!
recently i taken an intrest in babies
ok ok ill be honest i always always hated them for along time , but recently i strated to take an intrest in them now, there actuly cute, its just the screaming ones are a pain in the ass
but i think there adorable , mostly asian babies, with there glowing eyes !
there was a woman in japan center one day, her pram was hudge , like the victorian kind of prams, and i looked in she had a little girl i think and her eyes just stood out completely i was like omg thats the cuteist thing i have ever seen , but her pram was blocking the path to move arround in the shop so it was anouying at the same time lol
i wish i i had the curange to go up to her and say your babie is really cute, but i dident, ugh , unlike my mother she goes up to anyone when she finds something intresting lol!!
one time a little girl came up to me and started saying hi repetedly and the mother sayed sorry and the little girl sayed by! it was really cute i thought :)
makes me think , i would like to have one some day , and there i was saying i never want kids and im shure some of you out there sayed the same, but now i would like one, lol mother saying you will change your mind trust me xD and stuff!!
but i will always stick with the fact that i want to meet the right guyfor me
i dont want to rush into it , and im happy with shoon at the moment , even when i am 22 ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh that number 22 >:( ya ya im actuly 4 thanks ^_^
ugh i wanted to show u this little doll that i bought off ebay of a asian girl, i cant show the pic (ill get round to it)
yes i know what your thinking, omg baby toy your too old for it xD
well i think i comeing up to my motherly side of me, that i have not seen that this doll just like took my heart so cute in every....... ok im gonna shut up , im not that much of a softy...... reallly 0__o!
period pains, im gonna have to go lay down
you all take care everyone, and than you for all your birthday wishes :) it meens alot ^_^
bye bye xxxxxx

hi yall
well my b-day was yesterday and i have to tell you it was SHIT
ugh i dident do anything to be honest, ok so i went to town like i always do to get something and my mother completley upset me yesterday!
i sayed i was feeling weak and faint and she sayed to me, well you dont eat so its your own danm falt, if your laying there dead one day dont come running to me anymore because i cant be botherd with it
ill leve you to it she sayed!
oh thanks alot mother, its ment to be my birhtday and i get treated like that for saying im weak
yer and you cant talk eather you dont eat atall >:(
sorry but im going to have a rant ,im that upset about everything at the moment
today i been looking everywhere for my depression tabblets and i cant find them , i have to take them otherwise im going to be worse tomorrow and im going out to meet someone ohhhhh
seriously im not gonna lie but i think im going mad
ther other day my sister told me to get out the kitchin to tell MY best freind a secret!
it upset me that shes told everyone in this house and cant tell me >< what have i done
i been crying alot in my room due to issues in the past , sometimes i think to myself is there any point in going on , i sound so fucking selfish saying that i think alot about other people suffering and i wish there was some way i can help them but i too am suffering aswell , i wish there was some way i could meet other people like me out there and we can try and help eachother though!!!
i have not writen in a long time have i ...........
recently i found out shoon is only in duet, i guess thats due to his studys and the dude needs his free time aswell to chill so im not upset about it!!
>:(
just been told off agen!! for the tablet issuse
fucking hell i was looking for them and shes blameing me for not takeing them
PARENTS ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
right ill stop the depressingness

i always love my family members but you know what its like with a big family >< arguments 24?7 but we love eachother
we ,,, well i have a new hammy or dwarf hammy now aswell as shadow my other hamster
ill post some pics in a sec i gotta eat my dinner for now so laters people xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

i had a strange dream last night
it was based in a house i lived in before i moved here
i was in my bedroom reading a book and shoon was in the shower xD
i went into my mums bedroom and waited for him to come out!
but then the phone rang and my sister aunsered it and she sayed it was for me
so i took the phone call!
it was from this guy that wants to marry me and he does IN REAL LIFE!
and i remeber saying "what do you want!"
and he sayed "i want to meet up with you" and i sayed "no!" and put the phone down and went back upstairs to wait for shoon!
but then he rang agen and was determined to meet me!
so i gave in and took a long trip to london on that day
i was so pissed off because i wanted to be with shoon ...anyway
i met the jerk in london and he dident know where to go as in visiting places and such so i had to do everything myself! he was trying to hug me and hold my hand and stuff i was fumeing!
in the end he went into a store while i waited for him outside so i thought now is my chance to ditch the guy so i did hahaha!!
i took the train back home and went into my house
and shoon was not there!
i started to go crazy and question everyone! my sister sayed that he would be back soon i waited.
so i thought fine while im waiting i will take a shower
and when i went in there it was a mess because my mum coloured her hair and my sister used it to have a bath and i had ago at them saying
"i wanted to go in there before you 2 came in ><" "i wanted to go in after shoon not you 2" and started to have a fit, (i have no idea why i felt like that but i did) the thought of going in after shoon made me happy xD! (like saying to yourself , omg he touched my hand im never going to wash it ^^ like fans would do meeting a celeb)
anyway shoon came back and i calmed down and acted as if nothing happend and i went back into my room while he was in another room!
i decided to go and finaly talk to him witch i did and tryed not to sound like a crazy fan but talk normaly to him and we both did to eachother!
i went downstairs and he went to the kitchin and i went into the conservetery
there was a kock at the door
guess who it was!
the jerk that made me go all the way to london
he was shouting and banging the door and i started to get scared and started to cry and then shoon came up to me and sort of comforted me and my mother told the guy at the door to leve but he wouldent, he tryed to kick the door down!
shoon then took my hand and we escaped though the garden and over the wall and we both ran away ^_^
when i woke up insted of being in pain i felt so happy , i usaly get really nasty dreams where people attack me , well one was trying to hurt me but the guy i loved was there so the evilness kinda subsided
i made a picture too ^_^



left to right:
jerk , shoon, me, my sister!
the reasion shoon has a sword is because he is like my protector and i have a crown because im the dounsal in destress xD!!
the sword and crown were not in the dream
i just thought id add detail
yer im sad
GET OVER IT LOL

i herd yabu has an older brother xD
i would soooo love to see what he looks like >< seriously im keen to know

right i been reading that some users have been bullyed on here
due to some retarded girl who cant seem to get a life
i was not haveing it so i tryed to sort things out with her but im just going to ignore her now
and her freind who is in for the ride on her side aswell backing her up
saying im shit at english and its really lame that im one and that i cant spell!!!
SO FUCKING WHAT
i have learning difficults get over it alright
people like this make me mad and makes me wanna rant about things ugh it so pisses me off
anyway
i have had a great week so far
yesterday i went to town with a group of freinds, i had a great time
i bought a dress costing £60 and i got it for £10 because it was on sale XD BARGIN
oh yes i also went to a print shop a few days ago and had some images of shoon enlarged and ya ya yah!!!
im also planing to get a canvas , i cant spell that
anyway a canvas of shoon in big, my mum will get for me as a present she sayed so that will be something i would love on my birthday
shoon needs more love
i know i say it all the time but he is dissapering and its scaring me now >< i hope he does not leve this year like tayio did last year :(
hmm anyway , yes yesrterday i bought frames for all of the pics and im really happy with how its turned out!
i found out yesterday my chinese animal is the luckyist one of all , or so they say , im the rabbit and they say its the more luckysit one , how strange!!
i kinda feel lucky in a way
i meen when i was born i was close to death , but i lived and also my first toy was a rabbit aswell! very strange ><
anyway i will shut up now lol
i hope that everyone is all well
take care bye x

wheres shoon gone too?
i hope that he is alright im worryed about him now , i think he might be busy with college and stuff!!!
if anyone has the shoon duet 2009 sep scans i would be so greatfull

shoon really needs more love now because he is slowly dissapering in the jonnys entertanment and its worrying me alot ><
i dont want him to leve

lol its 2:38 im the morning here
im not tired atall
so i thought id share this with you all :)
i made this ages ago and i still think its cute


if u peoples wanna make something like this too just for fun then
go to
dollzmainia.com
its pritty kool
i meen im 21 and i went on here as a kid so yer
um my mind has gone dead >< sorry lol
laters yall x

retared heading but i dont care
um i wanted to ask u guys xD
whats the name of this band ^^



oh yer i herd about that NYC band
i meen who are they :S
they debut and ya ya yah dident and kis my ft dident or did ABC they been around longer it kinda makes me angery
and the leader of the band i dont even like him in the NYC
my freind told me he punchered a japanese mans car for fun and ruined the car and the man had to get his car fixed for what he did
so i dont like him atall
shoon shoon where has he been lately >< he is only in that school quiz show i wanna see him in more shows ><
i miss u ^^

its been a while since i posted
i been feeling down the past few days so thats one of the reasions why i guess
i watched that drama finaly all of it lol
putting yabu aside its a pritty kool drama
i thought that elderly lady was really sweet in the show and i got all emoshinal when she colaped on the beach lol
but she was fakeing it
hm
i dont know what else to talk about right now my minds pritty blank sorry xD
hope u all have a great weekend
take care
bye x all

can someone help me please
i really wanna see Ninkyo Helper and i noticed alot of people have seen the first part already
where can i watch it ?
thanks loads x